Our First Meeting With Kole

I hardly slept last night. We woke up and got ready to go meet our son, Kole. Alex called and said he would pick us up in about 5 minutes and we would go to a cafe to get some breakfast. I honestly, didn't want any breakfast; my stomach was in knots. We went into a really nice cafe' ordered some Americanos and a couple of fruit danishes. I felt so nauseous with anxiety I could barely eat or drink. Alex explains to us that he already went to the Administration of Children's Services with our papers, and now we need to go back there to pick them up. We walk a short distance to the administration building. He goes into the office and then motions for us to come in. There is a short, red-headed lady talking a mile a minute. She asks us a few questions about us, our family, where we live, why we want to adopt etc... Alex translates. We sign some papers and then get into Alex's car and follow her over in her car to go to the orphanage.

On the drive over I am trying my hardest to hold back tears. I can't even begin to explain the array of emotions I am feeling. When we pull up to the orphanage we step out of the car and Alex tells us it is OK to take pictures. His orphanage is actually pretty nice looking and they have a large fenced in playground area. We go inside and sit down in the hallway. Then they call us into the office. We are waiting and waiting. Alex tells us that Kole's biological parents come to visit him once a year and that they are OK with him being adopted by foreigners. We didn't know that his parents came to see him and I feel a little sad that we will be taking him so far away from them. I'm just not even sure how to process this information. Alex further explains to us that Kole's biological parents may want to meet us and that it might be better for us to meet with them and to get things squared away with them before we try to go to court. That way they will not try to appeal our adopting him. He said they have already terminated their parental rights, but it would be good to meet with them just to be safe.

They tell us that Kole was playing outside and he got a little dirty so they are cleaning him up before they bring him to see us. We laugh. We realize that we left the little teddy bear we brought for Kole in the car, so Drew quickly hurries to go get it. All of a sudden Kole rounds the corner holding the hand of an orphanage worker. He is so tiny and cute, he is wearing a pink and white shirt with Snoopy on it and blue shorts pulled up too high, with blue socks and white girls sandals. I tear up the moment I see him and I am frozen. We say hello and reach out and hand him the teddy bear. He reaches out and takes it and holds on to it and squeezes it like it is the only thing he has ever been given. He smiles and laughs and looks at the bear and hugs it some more. I am just staring at him; he is beautiful and so full of life. Finally I just outstretch my arms to him and he comes to me and hugs me. I mean he is really hugging me and squeezing me. I just start crying and I don't want to let him go. He is a little hesitant to hug Drew, because the children in the orphanage rarely see men; they are cared for by all women.

We play with him on the floor and we pull out the photo album to show him pictures of his brothers and us. He grabs it and looks through it over and over again. Every time he sees a pictures of Lane or Hudson he smiles and laughs and points to them. We tell him those are his brothers and he seems so happy. He sits on my lap and looks at the pictures over and over again and he squeezes his teddy bear. He is so little. He is about the size of a 3 yr old even though he is 6 yrs old. All the clothes we bought for him are going to be huge. We bought mostly 5T, so I guess we have some shopping to do when we get home. We only get to see him for maybe 15-20 minutes and they tell us he needs to go eat lunch, then take a nap. We make sure that they tell him we will be back. We give him one picture of us to keep with him, because they said for us to keep the album to bring to court later in the week. We hug him goodbye and kiss him. He waves and blows us kisses and smiles, then he leaves.

After we say goodbye to Kole we go to another room to meet with the orphanage doctor. She is perhaps the cutest and nicest old woman I have ever seen. She is tiny. She explains, in Ukrainian, that Kole was abandoned at the hospital and then brought to the orphanage when he was one month old. The first year was very difficult because he had trouble eating and he weighed too little. He had bronchitis and pneumonia before he was 18 mos old. He is very healthy now; he eats anything and everything. She says he is very independant; he feeds himself, uses the toilet on his own, dresses himself and he plays very well with all the other children. Drew is taking notes furiously because we are not sure if we will have real copies of his medical records to take with us. We ask the Dr. a few questions. She tells us in Ukrainian that we have a great responsibility and she thinks what we are doing is amazing. We tell her we love Kole and we will take very good care of him. She nods yes and smiles. Of course Alex is translating everything for us.

Then we go back to the director's office and they call Kole's biological parents. Alex speaks with the mother and the father on the phone and they say they are OK with us adopting Kole, but Alex arranges for us to drive about 90km tomorrow to meet with them. When we get back to the car I get in the back seat and just start crying. It's just all so overwhelming. Meeting Kole was as wonderful as we expected, but now I am so worried that his biological parents will change their minds after they meet us. I'm not sure how I even feel about taking him so far away from his biological parents. Does Kole know, when these people come to visit him once a year that they are his parents?

Please pray that our meeting with his biological parents goes well. Please pray for peace for Drew and I. Pray that whatever is best for Kole will happen. Pray that God's will be done and we will be at peace.