Nearly every adoption grant that we have applied for has asked us to include a copy of our "adoption story" and how we came to have the desire to adopt. When we sat down to write out our story we saw more and more how God has woven together even the littlest details in our lives to bring us to this place where we are adopting a son who has Down Syndrome into our family. So here's our story, all of it; it's not short, so you may want to go grab a cup of coffee first.
Drew and I talked about adopting even before we were married, so we always knew that somewhere down the road, God would grow our family through adoption. We wanted a large family and I knew I was no Michelle Duggar, so adoption seemed like a logical choice. We see adoption as perhaps the best earthly picture of what our Heavenly Father has done for us in making us His sons and daughters.
It was February 14, 2008, Valentine's Day, and Drew and I were on our way to see a Fetal Medicinal Specialist because on the previous day my OB had seen something on our ultrasound that concerned her. We prayed during the car ride over, believing that God was in control. After more ultrasounds at the specialist's; the Dr. told us that he believed our son had Trisomi 18 or Trisomi 13. He said that we should expect to lose our son by 20 weeks. Well, we prayed for a miracle and God answered; at 20 weeks Hudson was still growing and healthy. When we learned around 28 weeks that Hudson had Down Syndrome; we were relieved and overjoyed that he was going to be OK! I know for many people hearing that they will have a child with special needs is earth-shattering. But, for us it was good news; Hudson was going to live, and we really never felt sad or disappointed that God chose to give us a son with Down Syndrome. Hudson has brought immense joy into our lives and we see in him a picture of grace, every time we look at his sweet face.
Rewind to March 2005. We were expecting our oldest son Lane and although he was a "surprise" we were thrilled! At my first ultrasound apt. my OB saw something that concerned her. It appeared that Lane had a fluid mass at the back of his neck. So she referred us to a Fetal Medicinal Specialist. This fluid mass is often present in children with Down Syndrome or some other chromosomal anomaly. At home, the night before we were going to see the specialist, I remember sobbing. I told Drew, "I just don't think I can handle being the mother to a child with special needs." When we went to the specialist, he did not see the fluid mass they had seen the previous day; Lane was fine. I am ashamed at the selfishness in my heart then and that my faith was so weak. What a difference 3 years made. I went from weeping over the thought of having a child with special needs to rejoicing over having a son with Down Syndrome. Praise God for changing my heart. We view all our boys as a treasure.
Since having Hudson we have seen what a privilege and blessing it is to parent a child with special needs. We knew shortly after he born that we wanted to open our home to orphans with special needs, particularly Down Syndrome. We just didn't quite now how God would work out His plan.
So, fast forward to February 17, 2010. I am sitting in the waiting room of Hudson's Pediatric Therapists' Office and another mom (Kristi Cox) and I start talking and she begins to tell me of Reece's Rainbow Down Syndrome Orphan Ministry. I knew immediately this was how God was going to once again bless and grow our family. That evening I started looking at the website. I contacted Andrea, the Director of Reece's Rainbow to get the initial paperwork. Drew and I were certain that we wanted to adopt through Reece's Rainbow.
Thursday, Friday, and Saturday (Feb. 18-20)- We started looking through pictures on the website, praying, and talking about how this would work out. How would we ever decide on which child to adopt? But we were confident that God would direct. Saturday, Drew was away at seminary, while I was looking at more pictures and saw Nikolai (Kole). I was just immediately drawn to him, maybe because he looks so much like Lane and Hudson. After Drew got home and we talked some more, we emailed Andrea to find out what country Nikolai is in.
Sunday, February 21 - When Drew saw Nikolai's picture again, he too had an overwhelming sense that he was the one we needed to adopt. We found out that Nikolai is in Ukraine. Andrea sent us our commitment papers. We were so excited and continued to pray for God to providentially work everything out, just as he already had. We knew that God was telling us, "He's your son, you need to commit to adopt him now."
Monday, February 22 - We sent in our commitment papers for Nikolai! And we began working on the mounds of paperwork, getting our homestudy set up etc...
Tuesday, February 23 - We received an email from Andrea, the Director of Reece's Rainbow telling us the following
"just wanted to let you know....you just saved Nikolai from the institution. They were DAYS from transferring him. Our facilitator called and they said they will hold him."
By institution, she means a mental institution, which is where most children over age 4, with Down Syndrome who live in Eastern Europe and Russia will spend their lives. I couldn't stop crying. Nikolai (Kole) was nearly 6 years old, but God had been keeping him at the orphanage for us!
So here we are, May 6, 2010. In one month or so we travel to Ukraine and shortly after, we bring Kole home! And God has provided over and over again for our adoption. When we committed to adopting Kole in February we hadn't even begun to save for adoption; we really thought that adoption was going to be much further down the road for us. Now God has provided over $16,000 of the $25,000 needed for Kole's adoption.
We can't praise and thank God enough for all he has done. And we are just so grateful for the many people who have given toward Kole's adoption. We hope that when we are in Ukraine we will be able to have opportunities to share how great and mighty our Creator is. He created these beautiful children with Down Syndrome; they are not mistakes to be locked away in mental institutions. These are precious lives, as are the lives of all children. We hope that Kole's adoption is only the beginning of our family's journey of caring for orphans.
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Making Progress!
Well, I haven't written an update in a while because we have just been waiting, waiting to get some paperwork back so we could send our completed dossier to Ukraine. Last week we faxed a copy of our completed dossier to our facilitator in Ukraine, so she could proof read it, and so the translator could start translating.
We just got word today that we only to need to fix two documents and they are very small, easy fixes. So our dossier should be en route to Ukraine tomorrow! Then in a couple weeks we will have a definite travel date. Looks like Kole will be home in time to experience South Georgia during the hottest months of July and August :)
God has continued to provide and continued to bless this adoption through the generosity of others. To date we have saved/raised/been given/pulled together $16,000 toward our total cost of $25,000. About $3600 of that has been through donations. We now only have a $9,000 "deficit."
It has been exciting and encouraging to get letters and donations in the mail and to watch our donation fund through Reece's Rainbow grow each week. Lane and I have a good time doing our "donation dance" in celebration, and Hudson just laughs and claps when he sees us acting like the loonies we are.
Drew is finishing up this semester of seminary in a couple of weeks. I don't how he manages to work so much and study so hard and still be the awesome husband and father that he is. I know he will be glad to catch up on some sleep, at least for a couple of weeks between finishing seminary and traveling to Ukraine.
Hudson is having his adenoids removed and tubes put in his ears on May 12th; his surgery was postponed because he was sick with Bronchitis. Pray he stays well now so he can have his surgery and hopefully experience some relief!
Now that all the paperwork is done I feel a great sense of relief and it is a little easier to focus on the fun part of all this; getting Kole's bed ready, painting wooden letters so he can have his name over his bed like Lane and Hudson do, and putting together a photo album to take to Ukraine so we can show Kole pictures of his brothers, his house, his car, his relatives etc... We just can't wait til he is home!
We just got word today that we only to need to fix two documents and they are very small, easy fixes. So our dossier should be en route to Ukraine tomorrow! Then in a couple weeks we will have a definite travel date. Looks like Kole will be home in time to experience South Georgia during the hottest months of July and August :)
God has continued to provide and continued to bless this adoption through the generosity of others. To date we have saved/raised/been given/pulled together $16,000 toward our total cost of $25,000. About $3600 of that has been through donations. We now only have a $9,000 "deficit."
It has been exciting and encouraging to get letters and donations in the mail and to watch our donation fund through Reece's Rainbow grow each week. Lane and I have a good time doing our "donation dance" in celebration, and Hudson just laughs and claps when he sees us acting like the loonies we are.
Drew is finishing up this semester of seminary in a couple of weeks. I don't how he manages to work so much and study so hard and still be the awesome husband and father that he is. I know he will be glad to catch up on some sleep, at least for a couple of weeks between finishing seminary and traveling to Ukraine.
Hudson is having his adenoids removed and tubes put in his ears on May 12th; his surgery was postponed because he was sick with Bronchitis. Pray he stays well now so he can have his surgery and hopefully experience some relief!
Now that all the paperwork is done I feel a great sense of relief and it is a little easier to focus on the fun part of all this; getting Kole's bed ready, painting wooden letters so he can have his name over his bed like Lane and Hudson do, and putting together a photo album to take to Ukraine so we can show Kole pictures of his brothers, his house, his car, his relatives etc... We just can't wait til he is home!
2 Months Down 2 More Til We Go!
Drew and I have found ourselves joking and laughing a lot about how life has got to slow down at some point, right? As we started the new year we were looking forward to life seeming to have slowed down a bit. Ha! Well then February 17th came; that was the day we first heard of Reece's Rainbow through a friend while sitting in the waiting room of Hudson's (our youngest son) PT office.
Now just two months later we are waiting on only a few documents before we send our dossier to Ukraine; hopefully this will happen next week! We are also waiting to hear from several grants and a couple different interest free loan places. Pray for good news! We anticipate traveling in late May to mid June. Realistically we still have about a $14,500 deficit for all our adoption expenses. Raising $25,000 in four months is not so easy for us, but it seems like no big deal for God, so I keep reminding myself of that when I start to get worried.
I have never mentioned this before, but with any adoption there is always a possibility that when we get to Ukraine, Kole will no longer be available to adopt. A couple people have asked us what we would do if that happened, all I can say is that we just don't know. We both sensed very overwhelmingly that Kole was who God wanted us to adopt, so we are praying and trusting that he is being kept safely at the orphanage til we can bring him home.
In the midst of the paperwork and planning we have tried to keep our usual family routine. Lane is having a difficult time anticipating another big change for our family. He tells us often that he can't wait for Kole to get here, so he can teach him all about trains and jump on the trampoline with him. But, Lane does not like change, at all, so he seems anxious and insecure about what all this means for him. He is not happy that Drew and I will be gone for a couple weeks. So, we are really making an effort to keep his usual schedule and to spend lots of quality time with him one on one. Pray for his heart to be at peace and for him to adjust quickly and positively to having another new brother.
Hudson has had some minor health concerns over the past few weeks. Long story short he is having his adenoids out and tubes put in his ears. We are awaiting some results from his cardiologist so he can be cleared for another surgery. But he will probably have surgery within the next few weeks. Pray for us to not be anxious, pray that everything goes perfectly, and pray that the surgery brings about the results we are hoping for.
Though the past couple months have been stressful at times, God has taught us so much! It's been fun and exciting anticipating having another little guy running around the house. We learned to cut out some time and money wasters to make more time for simply spending time as a family. God is good and gracious!
Now just two months later we are waiting on only a few documents before we send our dossier to Ukraine; hopefully this will happen next week! We are also waiting to hear from several grants and a couple different interest free loan places. Pray for good news! We anticipate traveling in late May to mid June. Realistically we still have about a $14,500 deficit for all our adoption expenses. Raising $25,000 in four months is not so easy for us, but it seems like no big deal for God, so I keep reminding myself of that when I start to get worried.
I have never mentioned this before, but with any adoption there is always a possibility that when we get to Ukraine, Kole will no longer be available to adopt. A couple people have asked us what we would do if that happened, all I can say is that we just don't know. We both sensed very overwhelmingly that Kole was who God wanted us to adopt, so we are praying and trusting that he is being kept safely at the orphanage til we can bring him home.
In the midst of the paperwork and planning we have tried to keep our usual family routine. Lane is having a difficult time anticipating another big change for our family. He tells us often that he can't wait for Kole to get here, so he can teach him all about trains and jump on the trampoline with him. But, Lane does not like change, at all, so he seems anxious and insecure about what all this means for him. He is not happy that Drew and I will be gone for a couple weeks. So, we are really making an effort to keep his usual schedule and to spend lots of quality time with him one on one. Pray for his heart to be at peace and for him to adjust quickly and positively to having another new brother.
Hudson has had some minor health concerns over the past few weeks. Long story short he is having his adenoids out and tubes put in his ears. We are awaiting some results from his cardiologist so he can be cleared for another surgery. But he will probably have surgery within the next few weeks. Pray for us to not be anxious, pray that everything goes perfectly, and pray that the surgery brings about the results we are hoping for.
Though the past couple months have been stressful at times, God has taught us so much! It's been fun and exciting anticipating having another little guy running around the house. We learned to cut out some time and money wasters to make more time for simply spending time as a family. God is good and gracious!
If you feel lead to give toward Kole's adoption fund, you may do so as a tax deductible donation
through Reece's Rainbow by clicking HERE and following the instructions.
Be sure to designate your gift to the "Miles Family."
through Reece's Rainbow by clicking HERE and following the instructions.
Be sure to designate your gift to the "Miles Family."
Overwhelmed With Gratitude
We are blessed with wonderful, amazing friends and by other Christians all over the world. We are so thankful that so many of our friends are supporting us and encouraging us in adopting Nikolai.
On Sunday, some friends stopped by and handed us a check for $500 toward Nikolai's adoption. Then today I checked our sponsor link at Reece's Rainbow to see our account was at $1203. Some other friends had given $500. Some people we have never even met as well as many other friends have given, and we know they are making a sacrifice to do so. We are just blown away at the generosity we are experiencing. Nikolai has $3756 toward his adoption that did not come from us.
It's not just the monetary support that we are so grateful for. We have received so many emails and notes letting us know that we are being held up in prayer. It's so comforting to know that our family is being prayed for.
Our dear friends Jason and Joanna Bursch are giving a benefit concert May 7 at the NHCC Community Cafe in Taylors, SC, and are giving everything made toward Nikolai's adoption. And another friend is designing a poster and invitations for the concert.
Another friend gave us a stack of books to have, to sell on our Amazon account, and she is having a yard sale and giving us the proceeds from it.
Really! I think the list could go on and on. We just feel so overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can not express in words how much having the support and encouragement of friends means to our family.
On Sunday, some friends stopped by and handed us a check for $500 toward Nikolai's adoption. Then today I checked our sponsor link at Reece's Rainbow to see our account was at $1203. Some other friends had given $500. Some people we have never even met as well as many other friends have given, and we know they are making a sacrifice to do so. We are just blown away at the generosity we are experiencing. Nikolai has $3756 toward his adoption that did not come from us.
It's not just the monetary support that we are so grateful for. We have received so many emails and notes letting us know that we are being held up in prayer. It's so comforting to know that our family is being prayed for.
Our dear friends Jason and Joanna Bursch are giving a benefit concert May 7 at the NHCC Community Cafe in Taylors, SC, and are giving everything made toward Nikolai's adoption. And another friend is designing a poster and invitations for the concert.
Another friend gave us a stack of books to have, to sell on our Amazon account, and she is having a yard sale and giving us the proceeds from it.
Really! I think the list could go on and on. We just feel so overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can not express in words how much having the support and encouragement of friends means to our family.
Adopting the Hurt Child
I just started reading "Adopting the Hurt Child" by Keck and Kupecky, a few days ago. I've worked with children and teens in foster care and group homes before and I've seen and learned of how badly these kids are treated. In fact when I was 20 years old I had my first experience working with children in foster care, and it was that experience that God greatly used in my heart to give me the desire to one day foster and adopt.
The authors of this book state that in the U.S. alone, their are 510,000 children in foster care and 129,000 of them can be adopted (written in 2006). Most, if not all of these children have been hurt or abused, and it is often difficult for them to love and trust anyone. But there is hope, if a family will open up their homes and hearts to these children "it is never too late to hope."
It's convicting to think that we go to church every week and talk about God's love, we engage in debates over the downfall of our society, and we claim to be pro-life and fight for the rights of children. Yet, we have in America a great "problem;" these children, as the author points out, are "society's children." But, this problem is not without a simple solution. Do what Scripture tells us, as believers, to do. Care for the orphans. "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress" James 1:27.
Not everyone is called to be a foster parent or to adopt, but as Christians we are all called to care for these children. We all have a role to play in these childrens' lives. What is your role?
Adoption Progress Update
I feel like we may be setting the record for fastest paperwork filler-outers :) We have the final meeting for our homestudy tomorrow evening. We have a great homestudy agency which is processing our homestudy very quickly and not charging us the usual extra fee to do so. The director of the homestudy/adoption agency has been so helpful and has made herself available to answer our questions and help us pro-bono. She has been so patient and kind and has been a tremendous help to us. Reece's Rainbow has a team of volunteers that have compiled our dossier for Ukraine and are guiding us step by step as we complete it. Because we are adopting "independently" we are saving thousands of dollars. We could not do this without the time and help from those volunteers at Reece's Rainbow and the director of our homestudy/adoption agency.
We have completed our I600A Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition. This document along with our completed homestudy goes to USCIS (formerly INS) and they set up a time for us to go to Atlanta to be fingerprinted. Then they approve or disapprove of us adopting Nikolai and bringing him back to the US (the simplified version). Well this process typically takes 90 days in Georgia and we don't have 90 days. We have contacted Georgia Senator Chambliss' office and they have been so helpful. They have already contacted USCIS on our behalf and are going to follow up on our application. We pray and hope that the added nudge from the Senator's office will speed up our application!
Until USCIS approves and processes our paperwork we can't submit all of the necessary documents for our dossier (which goes to Ukraine). Please pray that everything will go smoothly and quickly. We want so badly to bring Nikolai home soon! We pray that he is kept safe and well til we can see him.
We have completed our I600A Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition. This document along with our completed homestudy goes to USCIS (formerly INS) and they set up a time for us to go to Atlanta to be fingerprinted. Then they approve or disapprove of us adopting Nikolai and bringing him back to the US (the simplified version). Well this process typically takes 90 days in Georgia and we don't have 90 days. We have contacted Georgia Senator Chambliss' office and they have been so helpful. They have already contacted USCIS on our behalf and are going to follow up on our application. We pray and hope that the added nudge from the Senator's office will speed up our application!
Until USCIS approves and processes our paperwork we can't submit all of the necessary documents for our dossier (which goes to Ukraine). Please pray that everything will go smoothly and quickly. We want so badly to bring Nikolai home soon! We pray that he is kept safe and well til we can see him.
I'm Not Really Sure What to Call This One
As children of God we are ADOPTED, we did nothing to earn the title "Child of God." We are His because He chose to make us His, even those of us that are the most difficult, unlovely, weird, whatever ... Yet Drew and I have received negative comments from "Christians" about the fact that we are adopting a child with Down Syndrome. They hurt and make me angry all at once. I wish I could make some people understand that we are not adopting because we naively think that our life will be a walk on the beach, or because we are ignorant of the fact that having children with special needs means things may be more difficult. I want to say to those people "We know what we are doing may appear crazy, we realize we are not rich, we know that at times we will grow weary, but where is your faith?" "There is so much more to life than being comfortable!"
We would rather never have nice cars, a big house, nice clothes etc... so that we are able to adopt children into our home, love them, make them our sons and daughters and provide for them. This is what God has called us do and we are so happy to do it. We would never have thought that we would be these people, but God knew all along that he was preparing us to be parents to children with special needs. I can't imagine doing anything else with my life and I don't want to.
Nikolai is our son, the same way Lane and Hudson are our sons. It just so happens that Nikolai has temporarily been in the custody of an orphanage in Ukraine. But, he has always been our son and God has always known that. Some just don't understand that. I don't fully understand myself, why we didn't find him sooner, how our hearts can love this little boy, who we have never even met, so very much. The only way I can explain anything is that it just has to be a God thing. And it kills us that on April 7, when Nikolai turns 6, he won't be with us to celebrate his birthday together. We think about him, worry about him and pray for him, just as much as we do Lane and Hudson. He is our son.
It just amazes that any one who claims to be a child of God would not fully understand and support another Christian's decision to adopt. Where would you be if God had not adopted you?
We would rather never have nice cars, a big house, nice clothes etc... so that we are able to adopt children into our home, love them, make them our sons and daughters and provide for them. This is what God has called us do and we are so happy to do it. We would never have thought that we would be these people, but God knew all along that he was preparing us to be parents to children with special needs. I can't imagine doing anything else with my life and I don't want to.
Nikolai is our son, the same way Lane and Hudson are our sons. It just so happens that Nikolai has temporarily been in the custody of an orphanage in Ukraine. But, he has always been our son and God has always known that. Some just don't understand that. I don't fully understand myself, why we didn't find him sooner, how our hearts can love this little boy, who we have never even met, so very much. The only way I can explain anything is that it just has to be a God thing. And it kills us that on April 7, when Nikolai turns 6, he won't be with us to celebrate his birthday together. We think about him, worry about him and pray for him, just as much as we do Lane and Hudson. He is our son.
It just amazes that any one who claims to be a child of God would not fully understand and support another Christian's decision to adopt. Where would you be if God had not adopted you?
A Snapshot of Grace
The last couple of weeks have been so busy with paperwork and meetings that I feel like I haven't had a lot of time to really reflect on many of the things that God has been teaching me. I like writing them down so I can really think them through, go back and revisit them and maybe someone else will be encouraged too.
The fact that God has rescued me from a life of sin and grafted me into his family has gained new meaning to me over the last few weeks. On many occasion as I have been working on adoption paperwork, I have stopped to think about how truly amazing it is that we can be called sons and daughters of the King. Our adopting Nikolai is a picture of God's grace in that way, but it is really only a snapshot of grace. What God did for us, we could never do, and his love is perfect, unselfish, and immeasurable.
As I have thought and prayed over being a snapshot of grace to Nikolai, this thought entered my mind "how am I a snapshot of grace to Lane and Hudson?" Am I a parent like God is a parent to me? Do I teach them in a kind and gracious manner? Do I make sure they know that they are forgiven? Am I as patient with them as God is with me? What kind of picture of God and grace am I painting?
God is patient, kind, slow to anger, always there, gracious, generous, and forgiving. He delights in his children and his love is perfect. That is the kind of parent I want to be and need to be.
The fact that God has rescued me from a life of sin and grafted me into his family has gained new meaning to me over the last few weeks. On many occasion as I have been working on adoption paperwork, I have stopped to think about how truly amazing it is that we can be called sons and daughters of the King. Our adopting Nikolai is a picture of God's grace in that way, but it is really only a snapshot of grace. What God did for us, we could never do, and his love is perfect, unselfish, and immeasurable.
As I have thought and prayed over being a snapshot of grace to Nikolai, this thought entered my mind "how am I a snapshot of grace to Lane and Hudson?" Am I a parent like God is a parent to me? Do I teach them in a kind and gracious manner? Do I make sure they know that they are forgiven? Am I as patient with them as God is with me? What kind of picture of God and grace am I painting?
God is patient, kind, slow to anger, always there, gracious, generous, and forgiving. He delights in his children and his love is perfect. That is the kind of parent I want to be and need to be.
Adopting Nikolai
So much has transpired in the last week it is somewhat difficult to remember what happened on which days. My last post talked about how Drew and I found out about Reece's Rainbow, a ministry for adopting international children with Down Syndrome. We knew right away that God was making it undeniably clear that this is what He has for us. I think the easiest way to explain what has occurred during the last week is through a timeline.
Wednesday, February 17 - We find out about Reece's Rainbow and start looking at the website. Contact Andrea, the director of Reece's Rainbow to get the initial paperwork. Drew and I are certain that we want to adopt through Reece's Rainbow.
Thursday, Friday, and Saturday - We are looking through pictures on the website, praying, and talking about how would this all work out. How will we ever decide on which child to adopt? But we were confident that God would direct. Saturday, Drew was away at seminary, while I was looking at more pictures and saw Nikolai. I was just immediately drawn to him, maybe because he looks so much like Lane and Hudson. After Drew gets home I email Andrea to find out what country Nikolai is in.
Sunday, February 21 - Drew sees Nikolai's picture and he too has an overwhelming sense that he is the one we need to adopt. We find out Nikolai is in Ukraine. Andrea sends us our commitment papers. We are so excited and continuing to pray for God to providentially work everything out, just as he already had. We are certain we want to commit to Nikolai.
Monday, February 22 - We send in our commitment papers for Nikolai! And we begin working on the mounds of paperwork, get our homestudy set up etc...
Tuesday, February 23 - We get an email from Andrea, the director of Reece's Rainbow telling us the following
"just wanted to let you know....you just saved Nikolai from the institution. They were DAYS from transferring him. Our facilitator called and they said they will hold him."By institution, she means a mental institution, which is where most children over age 4, with Down Syndrome will spend their lives. I couldn't stop crying. Nikolai is already 5, but God had been keeping him at the orphanage for us!
Today is Wednesday, February 24. We have seen God's hand working in so many little ways. He made it so clear that Nikolai was our son. Imagine if we had hesitated to commit to him. God told us to "move" so we did, and even though it may seem there are obstacles; God has and can move them. He already provided above and beyond what we needed for our application, promise trust and home study fees. We are confident that he is going to provide all we need to bring Nikolai home.
Nikolai could be coming home as soon as July! We are so excited to have found our son. We can't wait to hug him and love him and give him a new life.
All this has kept my mind thinking on how much greater the love of God is. That he would give his son and adopt me into his family, call me his child and love me with an everlasting love.
You can follow Nikolai's adoption story here at The Purple Sparrow or on our Facebook page "The Purple Sparrow." If you would like to sponsor the Miles family you can do so through designated giving at Reece's Rainbow. Please pray with us that we can bring Nikolai home soon.
Adopting a Child With Down Syndrome
Adoption is something that Drew and I have always known God had for us in our future. When Drew and I were dating, a friend of mine thought she would be funny and blurted out "Drew, you know Kam wants 12 kids, right?" When we got in the car Drew asked me "Do you really want 12 kids?" (He had a very concerned look on his face). I almost lied, but I told him I really did want 12 kids, give or take a couple. Thankfully, he didn't break up with me right then, and 7 years later we have been married for 5 yrs. and have two children.
Yesterday, as I sat in the waiting room of the Speech Therapist office a lady sat down next to me with her daughter who has Down Syndrome. We started talking and she told me about an adoption ministry called Reece's Rainbow that helps place international children with Down Syndrome into loving homes. I was immediately interested, actually my heart was pounding with excitement. I had almost skipped the kids therapy appointments that day!
When I got home I immediately went home and looked at www.reecesrainbow.com to find out more. I started weeping and couldn't stop. And it was not tears of pity for these children; it was tears of joy that God had answered my prayers. We had been looking into ways to foster or adopt children with Down Syndrome or other special needs, but because of the 90% abortion rate in the US there really are not a lot of children with DS available. My heart had been somewhat restless and impatient waiting for God to show me the "how." I thought "This is it!" I couldn't wait til Drew got home from work, I called him right away. We hadn't really even considered the possibility of adopting a child with Down Syndrome internationally, but now it just seemed so clear.
After the kids were in bed, Drew and I talked for hours; we looked at the pictures of these children waiting for their "forever family." I told Drew I had already requested and received the initial application. He laughed and said with a huge smile on his face "I figured you did, I just assumed you had probably already filled it out and sent it in too." (Which of course I had not). I love my husband, and I love that God brought us together, and has knit our hearts together in this way. And so the adoption journey has officially begun. Though, as I look back I see God's hand working in big and small ways to bring us to this place and preparing our hearts to adopt.
Please pray with us as we pray and plan. We have some logistical and financial obstacles to tackle. And I do not know how we will ever decide on just one child. We know God has already decided that.
Yesterday, as I sat in the waiting room of the Speech Therapist office a lady sat down next to me with her daughter who has Down Syndrome. We started talking and she told me about an adoption ministry called Reece's Rainbow that helps place international children with Down Syndrome into loving homes. I was immediately interested, actually my heart was pounding with excitement. I had almost skipped the kids therapy appointments that day!
When I got home I immediately went home and looked at www.reecesrainbow.com to find out more. I started weeping and couldn't stop. And it was not tears of pity for these children; it was tears of joy that God had answered my prayers. We had been looking into ways to foster or adopt children with Down Syndrome or other special needs, but because of the 90% abortion rate in the US there really are not a lot of children with DS available. My heart had been somewhat restless and impatient waiting for God to show me the "how." I thought "This is it!" I couldn't wait til Drew got home from work, I called him right away. We hadn't really even considered the possibility of adopting a child with Down Syndrome internationally, but now it just seemed so clear.
After the kids were in bed, Drew and I talked for hours; we looked at the pictures of these children waiting for their "forever family." I told Drew I had already requested and received the initial application. He laughed and said with a huge smile on his face "I figured you did, I just assumed you had probably already filled it out and sent it in too." (Which of course I had not). I love my husband, and I love that God brought us together, and has knit our hearts together in this way. And so the adoption journey has officially begun. Though, as I look back I see God's hand working in big and small ways to bring us to this place and preparing our hearts to adopt.
Please pray with us as we pray and plan. We have some logistical and financial obstacles to tackle. And I do not know how we will ever decide on just one child. We know God has already decided that.
Why Foster Parenting
When I was 21 years old I took a part-time job for a non-profit organization called Mentor Co. My "job" was to mentor, tutor and enrich the lives of children who were wards of the state in the foster-care system. It was to this day, the best job I ever had. I only worked there for a year or so and then funding was cut so the program ended. Over the course of my time there I worked with 3 children. Trey was 5 years old, he lived with his maternal grandparents, his parents were both in jail for dealing and using drugs. He was precious. I went to his head start daycare twice a week to work with him on his social skills and to give him some much needed one-on-one attention. His home life was a wreck, his grandparents fed him junk and only junk, and he watched TV all day after preschool til late into the night. His preschool teachers told me had "behavioral problems". You think? How could he not? He was starved for attention and affection. What he wanted most when I came to visit him was for me to hug him, and he loved the fact that I was there just to see him.
Sarah, was 7, she had been in and out of foster care and was back home with her mother when I first started tutoring and mentoring her. She was so sweet and so smart. She soaked in her school work. She really didn't need tutoring, just someone to remind her to do her homework. Something her mother was far too lazy to do. I couldn't believe the filthy apartment she lived in with her mom and 4 siblings. Her mom was usually high when I picked Sarah up and dropped her off. She said she wanted to come live with me, because I was so nice.
Then there was Max, he was 14. He had been in foster care his whole life. He had been in one foster home for over 8 years. There he was neglected, crammed into bedrooms with way too many children. He and the other foster and adopted children were so poorly supervised that some of them were sexually abusing one another. This was by the way at the home of people who claimed to be Christians. Max was behind in school and he was so angry and hurt over everything in his life. He was placed in a new foster home of a single mom and her son. She didn't care about Max, he was just a pay check for her. After a few months there, she said she couldn't handle his temper any more and Max was sent to live in a group home.
Not once did I meet a parent, foster parent, or teacher of these children that cared. That thought they could really amount to anything. That was willing to put in the extra effort needed. What is heart-breaking to me is that there are thousands more children like those kids who will just continue to slip through the cracks, barely noticed. And we as Christians will not help them, we will see them going to school with our own children and we will keep our kids away from them, we won't invite them over to play, we probably won't even learn their names. Maybe some of our churches will bus them in for Sunday School, probably keeping them in their own separate classes. And we'll think that's enough.
One pastor said that if every professing Christian family would foster parent or adopt just one child in the U.S., there would be no children left in the foster care system. We have thousands of children around us that need a home, a bed, parents who will love them. Nothing extraordinary, just a real home; one that won't give up on them, or get rid of them. I am not trying to make anyone feel guilty, just wanting us to think.
I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father has adopted me into His family. And He won't kick me out, no matter what I do. He loves me and cares for me.
That is why I want to be a foster parent. Not just because I love children, or because I want to feel like I've done something good with my life. I want my children to see an example of what Christ has done for us. I want them to grow up in a home that loves others and gives to others. I want to give as many foster children as possible a home where they will be loved and where they can learn about the love of our Savior.
We are currently in the process of becoming licensed foster parents. I can't wait. Hopefully sometime in June we will have two little girls added to our family. We are praying that God places two girls with us that we can eventually adopt.
Sarah, was 7, she had been in and out of foster care and was back home with her mother when I first started tutoring and mentoring her. She was so sweet and so smart. She soaked in her school work. She really didn't need tutoring, just someone to remind her to do her homework. Something her mother was far too lazy to do. I couldn't believe the filthy apartment she lived in with her mom and 4 siblings. Her mom was usually high when I picked Sarah up and dropped her off. She said she wanted to come live with me, because I was so nice.
Then there was Max, he was 14. He had been in foster care his whole life. He had been in one foster home for over 8 years. There he was neglected, crammed into bedrooms with way too many children. He and the other foster and adopted children were so poorly supervised that some of them were sexually abusing one another. This was by the way at the home of people who claimed to be Christians. Max was behind in school and he was so angry and hurt over everything in his life. He was placed in a new foster home of a single mom and her son. She didn't care about Max, he was just a pay check for her. After a few months there, she said she couldn't handle his temper any more and Max was sent to live in a group home.
Not once did I meet a parent, foster parent, or teacher of these children that cared. That thought they could really amount to anything. That was willing to put in the extra effort needed. What is heart-breaking to me is that there are thousands more children like those kids who will just continue to slip through the cracks, barely noticed. And we as Christians will not help them, we will see them going to school with our own children and we will keep our kids away from them, we won't invite them over to play, we probably won't even learn their names. Maybe some of our churches will bus them in for Sunday School, probably keeping them in their own separate classes. And we'll think that's enough.
One pastor said that if every professing Christian family would foster parent or adopt just one child in the U.S., there would be no children left in the foster care system. We have thousands of children around us that need a home, a bed, parents who will love them. Nothing extraordinary, just a real home; one that won't give up on them, or get rid of them. I am not trying to make anyone feel guilty, just wanting us to think.
I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father has adopted me into His family. And He won't kick me out, no matter what I do. He loves me and cares for me.
That is why I want to be a foster parent. Not just because I love children, or because I want to feel like I've done something good with my life. I want my children to see an example of what Christ has done for us. I want them to grow up in a home that loves others and gives to others. I want to give as many foster children as possible a home where they will be loved and where they can learn about the love of our Savior.
We are currently in the process of becoming licensed foster parents. I can't wait. Hopefully sometime in June we will have two little girls added to our family. We are praying that God places two girls with us that we can eventually adopt.
